Timing

Wow, am I ever glad it's a weekend! Hope you are enjoying yours, too. Things happen for a reason, and I'm beginning to see the great timing involved in starting a meditation/yoga practice a few weeks ago. Also, on coming back to blogging a couple of days ago. Funny how those things work out without our even knowing it or realizing until later. Well, I certainly have a great opportunity to practice self control and retaining my calmness.

I had my annual review at work on Friday. It was the worst review I have ever had in a long long history of work (I have a 20-some year-old son, so obviously I've been in the workforce quite a while!). The practiced breathing came in handy, if not essential during my face-to-face interview alone with Bosszila.

First, she asked me to tell about my accomplishments over the past year, which I did. Those were the only positive things said during the entire interview. Then came the (dirty) laundry list of grievances she had against me. These included the expensive trip I took--which she had insisted I go on despite my telling her it was going to be costly because of being so last minute; my problems in dealing with the contractor--which were due to a really loosey-goosey contract--but the event went smoothly and everyone raved about it and the fine job I had done; and the time I doodled during a staff meeting! Yikes!

But the next part of the review was a huge shock to me, even though it wasn't a surprise, does that make any sense? It logically followed what's been happening at work lately, yet I was unprepared and caught off guard.

First, she stripped me of my beloved library duties, which was why I was originally hired. Then she took away the contact with our clients, which is my very favorite part of my job and had received high praise and rave reviews during my last annual (a review which had been also done by her).

And then she dropped the boom on me, when I was already reeling from the shock of the first two things, that I am being demoted to a receptionist. I will lose my nice private office with a door and now will have to sit in front. I was ordered to tell no one and that an announcement will be made to everyone at the strategic planning meeting on Tuesday and Wednesday. I can hardly wait to be publicly denounced and demoted.

The really sick thing is that the most loyal and the only other hard-working person in the place, favorite co-worker is also getting screwed over. I wish I could warn her or give her a heads-up but I've been ordered not to tell. So while I was in shock and numb the remainder of Friday, I was hoping she would not come over to chat or ask me how the annual review went! She gives me lots work to do (as does everyone else, all eight other office people!) but we share a good work ethic and commitment to quality, so except for a little spat a while back, we've always gotten along really well.

I stopped at Barnes and Noble on the way home to look for a specific (career oriented) book but they didn't have it in stock. So I ordered it and then bought my younger brother's four boys each a Christmas present. Now I'm nearly done with shopping. When I got home and was debating whether or not just to go to bed, Vegetable Man called. I briefly explained what had happened, he invited me over but I said that I was too depleted and exhausted to drive that far. But he urged me to call back if I changed my mind. Which I did after about an hour of looking at jobs online. He had problems of his own, he's in the first days of trying to quit smoking. I jokingly told him that I have read that keeping one's mouth and hands busy will help. So he did. And we both were a lot happier.