Ostracized
Yep, that's me at work. An outcast. It's surprisingly painful too, even though I don't even like those people. Even the former temp whom I mentored and was good to -- she's turned against me. It sounds so melodramatic and IS so stressful. I came home from work feeling like someone had popped my balloon. I was too depressed and angry to even want to pull weeds from my garden.
It totally gives me new understanding of kids who get bullied in school. I don't know how they bear it. I'm having trouble handling it and I'm an adult. You know, the group of people laughing who when I approach hiss, "Here she comes!" and stare at me, or disband and walk away. Oh there are people who have smart answers for a situation like that, "What are you looking at?" or something else direct, but there's isn't anything that couldn't be easily and maliciously shot down by a group of ill-wishers. "We're not looking at YOU, that's for sure!" or, "How can we help looking at you when you take up the entire hallway?" (they are all mini-people, remember, and I'm much taller and larger than they are).
I know that the groups of people are not ALL talking and laughing about me, but it feels like it. And they want me to think that they are, even when they're not. I've already talked to HR about the situation, twice. Nothing is going to be done. Just like I've been hearing for years about bullies in school. They talk to and "counsel" the victim and do nothing to stop the bullies.
The lesson here is, you just don't mess with Favorite Co-worker because she's BZ's favorite. I knew that but stood up for myself anyway because I was right. And this is what it's gotten me. There are many projects that entail working with the other people at work. It's very difficult to do my work when nobody talks to me. They want me to quit, and I'm with them on this one! I want to quit too. I've had enough at their hands.
On the bright side (after all of that!) I AM driving down to see my son and his girlfriend. I had decided not to go, but he called me last night and sounded so disappointed that I changed my mind about it. So now I'm going. And might even check out some jobs and apartments just in case I get an offer on the house! Have a good day and a great weekend!
It totally gives me new understanding of kids who get bullied in school. I don't know how they bear it. I'm having trouble handling it and I'm an adult. You know, the group of people laughing who when I approach hiss, "Here she comes!" and stare at me, or disband and walk away. Oh there are people who have smart answers for a situation like that, "What are you looking at?" or something else direct, but there's isn't anything that couldn't be easily and maliciously shot down by a group of ill-wishers. "We're not looking at YOU, that's for sure!" or, "How can we help looking at you when you take up the entire hallway?" (they are all mini-people, remember, and I'm much taller and larger than they are).
I know that the groups of people are not ALL talking and laughing about me, but it feels like it. And they want me to think that they are, even when they're not. I've already talked to HR about the situation, twice. Nothing is going to be done. Just like I've been hearing for years about bullies in school. They talk to and "counsel" the victim and do nothing to stop the bullies.
The lesson here is, you just don't mess with Favorite Co-worker because she's BZ's favorite. I knew that but stood up for myself anyway because I was right. And this is what it's gotten me. There are many projects that entail working with the other people at work. It's very difficult to do my work when nobody talks to me. They want me to quit, and I'm with them on this one! I want to quit too. I've had enough at their hands.
On the bright side (after all of that!) I AM driving down to see my son and his girlfriend. I had decided not to go, but he called me last night and sounded so disappointed that I changed my mind about it. So now I'm going. And might even check out some jobs and apartments just in case I get an offer on the house! Have a good day and a great weekend!
12 Comments:
I know it's horrible now, but it'll blow over. You are valued at work for your work effort, otherwise why would they give you all that work? But you're not appreciated the way you should be. I hope you do get a new job with a great group of people who appreciate you.
Have a great weekend with your son!
I'm sorry about the treatment at work. I've definitely been there, done that one! It is a horrible situation but hopefully a temporary one. I hope you have a great weekend, including but not limited to someone seeing your house, falling in love with it, and making an offer!
Oh that's terrible. I'm so sorry you're having to endure these people and their small minded "clicks". Hang in there and be strong, you were right afterall, and you shouldn't be shut out because you're the only one that had the balls to speak up. Hang in there.
I trust you'll have a lovely weekend with your son and his lady. And I have my fingers crossed about a house sale! *hugs*
Yeah, I know the feeling. It's a COMPANY thing, wherever the location. Like ORDINARY GIRL said, you probably are valued at work. But whether or not they actually show you the appreciation or not is the question. If not, it might be the signal to move on... Yeah, do have a good weekend with your son! It's nice to have a place to go for a change in scenery and atmosphere.
There is nothing worse than working in a hostile work envirnonment, and with the stress of trying to sell your house on top of it, it can't be easy.
I hope you had a great, relaxing time at your son's.
Always do the best you can and kill them with kindness. The best we can do is all we can do.
And remember your order of importance:
1.God
2.Family
3.Work
That's too bad; you've been struggling with this for a long time. It's too bad that supposedly mature women resort to such behavior, but I have seen something like this before. Men have myriad faults, and we are frequently reminded of them, but not this one -- or at least not in my experience.
you know, you're above all these lousy co-workers who will one day wake up and realise that they're souls are dead.
damn, screw the grammar.
I'm soo sorry! I'd love to come slap them for you...degenerates! That's what comes of having biotch women bosses! These are not rational thinking people. You can (if you have to at some point) fill a grievance siting a hostile working environment...it's the truth. See a doctor is you need to for the stress...you may need to. Don't let these twerps get away with this crap! Also...don't let them push you out...stick it out...but see that doctor for the stress and have it on record...and log everything that happens to you. They are being biased toward you in more than one way. Take a camera in and take pictures of the little groups...beat them at their own game. Outlast them! JERKS!
Don't let this bunch of assholes put you down.
They are only demonstrating their true colors and if your employer stands by and lets this happen then they are no better.
I hope you find a job soon and be rid of them.
Then I hope the sink down the sewer they came from.
I hope you had a nice tilme at your son's place
Keep your chin up. God, I am so sorry. You spend so much time at work that the least you can hope for is some fun there.
I think it sucks that everyone seems to...juvenile. Can you call a meeting to discuss things or is it not that sort of place?
Hold on, sweetie.
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