Playing with the pagans

Can you guess that I had a super-duper, fantastic, really good time at the Pagan Pride event? I can’t remember when I last had such unadulterated, good fun! The two-and-a-half-hour ride down was comfortable. I sat alone in the back seat of the car. The other potential passenger worked nights and didn’t make the pickup spot on time. The witch (for that is what she calls herself) and her teenaged cool daughter sat in the front.

They were not what I was expecting. I had a new-age type woman sit by me in the airport in Cleveland and I was expecting my kind driver to be sort of like her, a bit pretentious and a bit of a snob in gorgeous flowing, hand-made clothing from some co-op in a third-world country, spouting references to mythological gods and goddesses. Instead the mother/daughter duo were intense, honest, a few tattoos and piercings, black-clad people, sort of like Goths, gritty and real. The car was old, a little battered and smelled like dogs and cats. The car seats had animal hairs all over and some sort of unfamiliar rock music was playing. They live near my old (rough) neighborhood in town. I had an interesting trip down to the Cities with them, as you can well imagine!

They told me funny stories of botched rituals and what to expect from the other pagans. Good thing I was fore-warned about the many strange costumes and modes of dress I would be seeing! I think my jaw might have dropped open at viewing men in long and short skirts and kilts, people dressed in black hooded robes, people in white muslin robes with a rope for a belt, men in fur and deer antlers and of course, the colorful, flowing hand-made clothing that I had thought of when I thought of pagans. The really odd and wonderful thing was after spending only an hour or two at the event, the strange costumes began to look sort of normal—just very interesting normal!

If I was looking for a man, this event would have been a happy hunting ground! There were so many drool-worthy pagan guys that it made my head spin: the witty adorable fire-throwing man, so cute and perky, the tall, kilted absurdly handsome magazine publisher with long black hair flowing down his back (he sat right next to me and I could barely breathe at first! He looked like one of those guys on the cover of a bodice-ripper novel.), and the guy in black leather who smelled like licorice, just to name a couple of the hot guys at this event.

There were plenty of activities to choose from: Bardic Challenges of poetry, songs, stories, chants and music. Filk Challenges: taking a well-known song and replacing the original lyrics. Translation Challenges: translating the meaning of an ancient text. Saga-Go-Rounds, Toast or Boast.
Mystik Toyz where toys from all over the world were first demonstrated, and then the audience of all ages was invited up to play with the toys, it got very chaotic and there was some wild tribal music to go with it! The pagan press room had free food: some huge subway sandwiches, chips and sweets. There was a labyrinth (remember me writing about them in my old blog?) for walking meditation outside.

Everywhere I went the people smelled SO good, I wanted to smell as wonderful as the pagans! There were all sorts of vendors and I bought things: three funny bumper stickers for SLA, a calendar, a T-shirt “Live by the Sun. Love by the Moon” some Nag Champa incense, and some “Karma” perfumed oil. There also was some gorgeous hand-made jewelry that I wish I could have purchased and some stones.

There was a belly dance troupe who were simply wonderful! They were strong, sexy women of all sizes dancing to a live band. The audience clapped along with the drums and many of the women and little kids in the audience joined in the dancing. Speaking of drums, the sound was everywhere. I really love the sound of drums. If I hadn’t before, I do now!

Witch Woman and I were exhausted when we drove back home (cool teen-aged daughter had found another ride) but so wound up that we discussed politics, religion, home-schooling and children all the way back. It’s so refreshing to be able to talk about those subjects openly and honestly!

And today is Monday, a work day. I’d rather be playing with the pagans! So how was your weekend?

From my E-mail
Actual Lines from Resumes

I am very detail-oreinted.

My intensity and focus are at inordinately high levels, and my ability to complete projects on time is unspeakable.

Thank you for your consideration. Hope to hear from you shorty!

Enclosed is a ruff draft of my resume.

It's best for employers that I not work with people.

Here are my qualifications for you to overlook.

I am a quick leaner, dependable, and motivated.

If this resume doesn't blow your hat off, then please return it in the enclosed envelope.

My fortune cookie said, "Your next interview will result in a job." And I like your company in particular.

You hold in your hands the resume of a truly outstanding candidate!

I saw your ad on the information highway, and I came to a screeching halt.

Insufficient writing skills, thought processes have slowed down some. If I am not one of the best, I will look for another opportunity.

Please disregard the attached resume -- it is terribly out of date.

Seek challenges that test my mind and body, since the two are usually inseparable.

Reason for leaving last job: The owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia. I prefer to elaborate privately.

Previous experience: Self-employed--a fiasco.

Exposure to German for two years, but many words are inappropriate for business.

My experience in horticulture is well-rooted.

Experience: Watered, groomed, and fed the family dog for years.

I am a rabid typist.

Education: College, August 1880 - May 1984.

I have a bachelorette degree in computers.

Excellent memory; strong math aptitude; excellent memory; effective management skills; and very good at math.

Graduated in the top 66% of my class.

Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school.

Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.

Special skills: Experienced with numerous office machines and can make great lattes.

I worked as a Corporate Lesion.

Special Skills: Speak English.

Served as assistant sore manager.

Reason for leaving last job: Pushed aside so the vice president's girlfriend could steal my job.

Married, eight children. Prefer frequent travel.

Education: B.A. in Loberal Arts.

Objective: To have my skills and ethics challenged on a daily basis.