Leaving again
My son came home on Sunday night and informed me that yes, he's moving to his girlfriend's city. He will be starting his new job there next Monday. It's his dream job, plus rents are cheap in that city, despite the fact there are lots of good-paying jobs. Not like here. I'm thrilled for him. But not for me. I'll really miss him. It was peaceful but pretty lonely the week he was gone. I know that he's well past the age where he should have been out on his own, and in fact has been out on his own, twice now. But I think this one will be a keeper. He's moving next Saturday, on my Dad's birthday. That is going to be a difficult day for me.
It's so odd that I was so ready for him to be out on his own after he graduated from high school, and then later when he first got an apartment. But not now. It's weird but I've formed sort of an emotional dependancy on him and living vicariously through him. I think that doesn't normally happen with two parents in the house, or a parent and his/her partner. The son/daughter is part of the family, while my son had become sort of like my best friend in the past year. Not that he would feel that way, but I do.
Oh, I know that he needs to go off (finally!) on his own, but I'm sad about it, really sad. I'll miss him terribly, that little whistle he does in the house, hearing about his work, friends, girlfriend, knowing that he's coming home. That will be the worst, to be in the house alone and know that he won't be coming in later from work, or ever except to visit. And I doubt that will be often, once he gets all of his things.
I think a parent (especially a single parent without a live-in partner) just keeps doing his/her job of watching over their (adult) child, focusing on him or her. So it really is better for the both of us and I will fill up the sudden hole in my life. Yep, I really really understand my Mom much better now!
It's so odd that I was so ready for him to be out on his own after he graduated from high school, and then later when he first got an apartment. But not now. It's weird but I've formed sort of an emotional dependancy on him and living vicariously through him. I think that doesn't normally happen with two parents in the house, or a parent and his/her partner. The son/daughter is part of the family, while my son had become sort of like my best friend in the past year. Not that he would feel that way, but I do.
Oh, I know that he needs to go off (finally!) on his own, but I'm sad about it, really sad. I'll miss him terribly, that little whistle he does in the house, hearing about his work, friends, girlfriend, knowing that he's coming home. That will be the worst, to be in the house alone and know that he won't be coming in later from work, or ever except to visit. And I doubt that will be often, once he gets all of his things.
I think a parent (especially a single parent without a live-in partner) just keeps doing his/her job of watching over their (adult) child, focusing on him or her. So it really is better for the both of us and I will fill up the sudden hole in my life. Yep, I really really understand my Mom much better now!
14 Comments:
Aw, PB...I sure hope everything works out and you begin to enjoy your having your place to yourself.
Isn't it something that we seem to want what we no longer have? There are days I dream of living with just my dog....no other humans in the house. I know I'd miss them sometimes but sometimes I'd LOVE some solitutde!!!
Hang in there, hon...:)
Maybe this si what you need to to move on to.
This is a new begining for the both of you and its not like you cant see each other everynow and then.
Have a nice day
I totally understand your feelings. I just spent a week with my daughters on vacation and now there is this hole in me. I miss them terribly.
Eeek! An empty nest! It'll be hard at first, I'm sure but soon enough, you won't know how you ever coped with another person to think about all the time. Think of the fun you can have now; rave parties all weekend, blaring music whenever you like and you can drink from the OJ carton without worrying about anyone else's germs!
Think of all the sleep interruptions you'll no longer have! Yeah, I'm sure it's going to be tough. Maybe it's time to redecorate (not expensively, just make the place more yours). That always helped me.
Ah I am sorry to hear your son is leaving. Hope you enjoy having the house to yourself tho. Take care x
All nice comments here! I tend to agree with Walker.You'll be siing lots of him. Don't worry. :)
Oh, yes. We humans are interesting. I sometimes fantasize about living alone again and being the professional, working woman with no responsibilities except to myself again.
Until you have children, you don't realize how your heart can break.
Hang in there....
finally understand it from a parent's perspective regarding the whole leaving of the nest...
Mine graduates the University in June...and I certainly hope he gets his business off the ground in a big way. He already has his own a computer design business slowly going...but it needs to be better for him to move out on his own. I can't wait! But I still have Mr. Sumo to make miserable to the end of his days...so I'm not lacking for flesh in that way.
well, you are only ever a phone call away.
and now you can throw anne summers parties.
I know you will be a bit sad, but You will probably enjoy having the house to yourself. And I'm with everyone else, I bet you will still see quite a bit of him!
Perhaps this will be some sort of a turning point for you. That sounds bad, as if you need one or something, but I'm just thinking that it may be at times like these that we make some sort of positive change that we might pass up if we were stuck in the status quo.
I totally agree with AC. Sometimes we need a little push into Terra Incognita to help us grow. I don't mean to sound unsympathetic, but he'll only be a phone call away. Remember how you mourned the loss of your privacy when your mum came to live with you? If I lived closer, PB, I'd pop over every day for a cup of coffee. Then you'd never be lonely.
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