Wingy thingys on the road

Thank you all for the birthday wishes, it's a belated thank you as I should have mentioned it yesterday! I love comments, makes my day!

Yesterday was another busy day at work battling the forces of evil. On the way into town Monday morning, there was a long line of cars on the freeway enter ramp. With flashing lights on a large flatbed trailer, a huge thing that looked like an airplane wing was headed onto the freeway! With great difficulty we lined-up cars managed to get around it. The thing stuck out into the other lane. It did have an “Oversized Load” sign on the back, no kidding! Over-slow load would have been a good sign too. I sped my way into town, having left home later than I should have. Isn’t that the way it goes? The one day I leave for work later than normal is the day for a pokey road hog on the freeway.

I decided to be a bit more careful about the speeding after I saw two cars (in different places) pulled over by the state patrol. Then a bank of brake lights ahead of me again. Oh no, it was the other airplane wing, or whatever they were, taking up both lanes on the freeway and cruising at the whipping speed of 40 mph! I turned my already loud radio up ever louder to combat the stress of possibly being late to work, me, who’s always early to the office!

The airplane wing and flatbed truck took a right onto the bridge along with the obnoxious blinking entourage. The accompanying vehicles had out-of-state license plates like Illinois and Florida. I got a good look at the place where the wing-thing would connect to an airplane and it sort of looked like a computer printer cord, except round. It was the oddest looking thing. I’m not sure it WAS an airplane wing but the first one looked just like it, so there was a set of two of the thingys. What do you suppose they were?

from my E-mail(some seem familiar, might have posted them before)
Oneliners
The Government wants more money? Why don't they try selling candy bars like the Boy Scouts do?

Many people will spend the summer occupied with fishing and politics. In fishing you use a worm, and in politics a worm uses you.

A person that learns from their mistakes is smart. A person that learns from other people's mistakes is smarter.

Why be difficult? Put some effort in and be impossible.

I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end.

I'm learning to speak Spanish by calling my bank and pressing the #2 button.

It takes less time to do something right than to explain why you did it wrong.

The things you tell your teenagers don't reach them 'til they're in their 40s.

He who lives without discipline dies without honor.

I have a speech impediment . . . my foot.

I need some duck tape . . . my duck has a quack in it

I was thinking of becoming a doctor. I have the handwriting for it.

The more you say, the less people remember.

98% of the time I am right. Why worry about the other 3%.

With proper diet, rest, and exercise a healthy body will last a lifetime.

Thesaurus: ancient reptile with an excellent vocabulary.

Practice courtesy. You never know when it might become popular again.

Any sports fan can tell you the most brutal thing about professional football is the price of the tickets.

It's discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

The measure of success is not how much money you have in the bank, but rather how much money the bank will lend you.

The real goal is to be rich the moment after you die.

Anyone who starts a sentence "With all due respect..." is about to insult you.

Don't count your fish until they're on dry land.

Don't judge, you idiot.

Marriage is like a tourniquet; it stops your circulation.

Everything on land is within walking distance.

The road to success is marked with many tempting parking places.

We're not truly happy until we focus on others.

Sarcasm: an ingenious way of making intelligent people feel stupid.

Love isn't blind . . . it just has Attention Deficit Disorder.

Life is a bowl of cherries . . . overpriced and only available at certain times.

A lot of good-looking faces are wasted on ugly people.

Funny that most of our best-sellers are written at a 9th-grade reading level.

Small talk is one step down from no talk.

If it weren't for humor, we might never get at the truth.

To understand politics, we must read between the lies.