Making a mark
Yesterday at work the lawyer’s office next door needed a witness to the signing of a codicil. That happens every once in a while and reminds me of when I worked in a legal office in Florida. There, two attorneys with two different offices worked side by side at a small office mall. The other secretary and I, often alone in our respective offices, did wills and codicils for clients and needed each other as witnesses.
Anyway, yesterday I went over to the office next door and was introduced to the clients, an elderly man and his wife. The man was amending his will and was seated in front of the big lawyerly desk in a wheel chair, with his well-dressed wife by his side. The legal secretary read him just a part of the will (he had read through the rest) and presented it for him to sign. His wife sprang to attention and put the pen into his hand, he still couldn’t hold it. She tried putting the pen between other of his fingers and that didn’t work either. He didn’t have the strength in his hand to hold on to the pen. The secretary told her clients, “Just a moment” and we all (secretary, her assistant and I) left the room and went into their legal library to look up the law on signing a will. In Florida any mark so witnessed was a legal signature, but this is in a different state and I’ve never been a legal secretary here. Turns out that the law was the same here, any voluntary mark, even assisted (as in guiding the hand) if witnessed by two people was a legal signature.
So we went back into the room and the secretary asked him to sign. “But I can’t” the old man said, very sadly. The secretary told them that his wife could help him, so she did, for both required signatures. It took a long time even with a guiding hand from his wife, the assistant held the paper down so it wouldn’t slide. The poor man was exhausted from his effort of making two little marks on the papers.
The rest of the day, even though it was busy, I thought about that man. He wasn’t able to walk. He wasn’t able to move his hands. I wondered what his days were like. What did he do all day, what did he do for fun, what did he enjoy? Was his wife the one who fed him, since he obviously could not feed himself. Was she the one who cleaned him up in the bathroom? I hoped she had help to assist her with all of the work, and all of the heavy lifting and transferring. I thought of my Dad’s last, long days and the fact that he didn’t want anyone but my Mom taking care of him. It wore her out and ruined her health.
And why was he changing his will? Was he adding someone in, or cutting someone out of his inheritance? Was this wife a second wife being added to the will so his children would not get all of the inheritance and leave her with none. She had seemed rather pleased with the proceedings. Why was he messing with his will at all? Was he diagnosed terminal, like my Dad, or did he just want to die and leave his poor immobile body behind and was hoping this act of acquiescence would hurry the process. Maybe changing his will was one of the only acts he could yet perform to feel that he still had movement in this world. All day, I wondered.
Switching gears, I received my new driver’s license in the mail Monday night. It isn’t the worst I’ve had, but it’s still quite unflattering. It’s not even laminated and is made of cardboard. But it certainly came quickly, the last driver’s license took weeks to arrive in the mail.
The return visit to the farm last night was lovely. It took me an hour and fifteen minutes to drive there. That’s counting the two times I had to backtrack and find the right way! Also there was road construction on the freeway part which was slow going. Guess I won’t be driving out there every day after work! Especially with the price of gas, filled up the Jeep for $40! Vegetable man works evenings, so it's better for me to come back home and not stay over. Plus I have pets to care for and my son works irregular, long hours.
So it’s Wednesday already? This seems to be a fast week. Have a great day!
from my E-mail
Those Urban Legends Will Get You
Chain Letters
I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me your chain letters over the past two years. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy. Because of your concern.......
--- I no longer can drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
--- I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.
--- I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
--- I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.
--- I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
--- I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
--- I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
--- I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our troops.
--- I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a stupid number for which I will get the phone bill from hell with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.
--- I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.
--- I no longer go to bars because someone will drug me and take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.
--- Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an email to 7 of my friends and make a wish within 5 minutes.
--- I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who has been dying for the past seven years.
--- I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.
--- Now to Return the Favor: If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60 seconds, a large bird with diarrhea will fly over your head at 5:00 PM and the fleas of a thousand camels will infest your armpits.
I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of a friend of a friend's neighbor's cousin, and he's a lawyer. So you'd better get going on that e-mail!!!
Anyway, yesterday I went over to the office next door and was introduced to the clients, an elderly man and his wife. The man was amending his will and was seated in front of the big lawyerly desk in a wheel chair, with his well-dressed wife by his side. The legal secretary read him just a part of the will (he had read through the rest) and presented it for him to sign. His wife sprang to attention and put the pen into his hand, he still couldn’t hold it. She tried putting the pen between other of his fingers and that didn’t work either. He didn’t have the strength in his hand to hold on to the pen. The secretary told her clients, “Just a moment” and we all (secretary, her assistant and I) left the room and went into their legal library to look up the law on signing a will. In Florida any mark so witnessed was a legal signature, but this is in a different state and I’ve never been a legal secretary here. Turns out that the law was the same here, any voluntary mark, even assisted (as in guiding the hand) if witnessed by two people was a legal signature.
So we went back into the room and the secretary asked him to sign. “But I can’t” the old man said, very sadly. The secretary told them that his wife could help him, so she did, for both required signatures. It took a long time even with a guiding hand from his wife, the assistant held the paper down so it wouldn’t slide. The poor man was exhausted from his effort of making two little marks on the papers.
The rest of the day, even though it was busy, I thought about that man. He wasn’t able to walk. He wasn’t able to move his hands. I wondered what his days were like. What did he do all day, what did he do for fun, what did he enjoy? Was his wife the one who fed him, since he obviously could not feed himself. Was she the one who cleaned him up in the bathroom? I hoped she had help to assist her with all of the work, and all of the heavy lifting and transferring. I thought of my Dad’s last, long days and the fact that he didn’t want anyone but my Mom taking care of him. It wore her out and ruined her health.
And why was he changing his will? Was he adding someone in, or cutting someone out of his inheritance? Was this wife a second wife being added to the will so his children would not get all of the inheritance and leave her with none. She had seemed rather pleased with the proceedings. Why was he messing with his will at all? Was he diagnosed terminal, like my Dad, or did he just want to die and leave his poor immobile body behind and was hoping this act of acquiescence would hurry the process. Maybe changing his will was one of the only acts he could yet perform to feel that he still had movement in this world. All day, I wondered.
Switching gears, I received my new driver’s license in the mail Monday night. It isn’t the worst I’ve had, but it’s still quite unflattering. It’s not even laminated and is made of cardboard. But it certainly came quickly, the last driver’s license took weeks to arrive in the mail.
The return visit to the farm last night was lovely. It took me an hour and fifteen minutes to drive there. That’s counting the two times I had to backtrack and find the right way! Also there was road construction on the freeway part which was slow going. Guess I won’t be driving out there every day after work! Especially with the price of gas, filled up the Jeep for $40! Vegetable man works evenings, so it's better for me to come back home and not stay over. Plus I have pets to care for and my son works irregular, long hours.
So it’s Wednesday already? This seems to be a fast week. Have a great day!
from my E-mail
Those Urban Legends Will Get You
Chain Letters
I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me your chain letters over the past two years. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy. Because of your concern.......
--- I no longer can drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
--- I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.
--- I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
--- I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.
--- I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
--- I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
--- I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
--- I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our troops.
--- I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a stupid number for which I will get the phone bill from hell with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.
--- I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.
--- I no longer go to bars because someone will drug me and take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.
--- Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an email to 7 of my friends and make a wish within 5 minutes.
--- I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who has been dying for the past seven years.
--- I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.
--- Now to Return the Favor: If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60 seconds, a large bird with diarrhea will fly over your head at 5:00 PM and the fleas of a thousand camels will infest your armpits.
I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of a friend of a friend's neighbor's cousin, and he's a lawyer. So you'd better get going on that e-mail!!!
16 Comments:
i love that you all find my socialite alias amusing, i could have made up something glamourous but i tried to be truthful...
my surname used to be Bamford so Bumfluff was the funniest thing the kids at school could come up with...they tortured me for years with that...lol
:0)
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
your story of the old man reminds me of my Mother. She is wheelchair bound and has only ver limited use of her hands. She has homecare to et her up, wash/bath her and get her dressed. Forages she wanted my father to do everything for her. He just couldn't do it. This homecare arrangemnt is better. My Uncle and Myself put her to bed when Dad works late.
I am glad you finaly got to the farm last night.
In some ways I am glad I don;t have a car petrol prices are soaring so high now
(sorry I deleted my comment as it read really wrong)
Have a good day
That's sad about that man...it does make you wonder what his story is, doesn't it?
Glad you had a nice visit with Vegetable man...:)
I think the current Dl picture I have is THE WORST one I have ever taken. Ugh! :)
Having to do with Urban Legends.
The "Forwarders" A 12-Step Program
Everyone say it with me ...
I will not get bad luck, lose my friends, or lose my mailing lists if I don't forward an email!
I will not hear any music or see a taco dog, if I do forward an email.
Bill Gates is not going to send me money.
Victoria's Secret doesn't know anything about a gift certificate they're supposed to send me.
Ford will not give me a 50% discount, even if I forward my email to more than 50 people!
I will never receive gift certificates, coupons, or freebies from Coca Cola, Cracker Barrel, Old Navy, or anyone else if I send an email to 10 people.
I will never see a pop-up window if I forward an email ... never!!
There is no such thing as an email tracking program, and I am not stupid enough to think that someone will send me $100 for forwarding an email to 10 or more people!
There is no kid with cancer through the Make-a-Wish program in England collecting anything! He did when he was 7 years old. He is now cancer free and 25 years old and doesn't want any more postcards or get-well cards.
The government does not have a bill in Congress called 901B (or whatever they named it this week) that, if passed, will enable them to charge us 5 cents for every email we send.
There will be no cool dancing, singing, waving, colorful flowers, characters, or program that I will receive immediately after I forward an email. None, zip, zero, nada!!
The American Red Cross will not donate 50 cents to a certain individual dying of some never-heard-of disease for every email address I send this to. The American Red Cross receives donations.
And finally, I will not let others guilt me into sending things by telling me I am not their friend or that I don't believe in Jesus Christ. If God wants to send me a message, I believe the bushes in my yard will burn before He picks up a PC to pass it on!
This story hits home as I am caring for my elderly father who is suffering from dementia. Presently he lives alone (my mom died several years ago) and it is getting harder and harder for him (and me) to maintain his home. Thank you for this post.
That is so sad about that old man. My grandad got ill with cancer & couldn't get up & downstairs by himself but refused to sleep on the couch as he wanted to be with my nan - which I thought was so cute so every night one of the family went round to help get him into bed so he could sleep with nan. Nan was so tired we had to put grandad in hospital just for a week so she could have a break. Unfortunately he died in hospital before the week was out. I hope he was changing his will to make sure his wife got something (if that's the way it was) as it is so tough caring for someone in that position.
That is the saddest story. I feel so sorry for that man.
What I am wondering is that could he not sogn it or was he reluctant to sign it.
My sister in laws fathers girl friend took him out of the hospital and married him while he was on morphine and then brought him back to the hospital.
He is on his last day.
The sister in law took him to the court house after he was released from the hospital with a letter from the doctor and had it annuled.
Food for thought
Have a nice day
It's in my mind that I need to make a new will too, before I am that old man. It's coming ... but not for a while, I hope.
That is a very sad story. I do not have a will and am sort of in a position where I should have one. This makes me think about it, thank you.
Katya: That's such a funny, cute name! I used to know a Stacy Bamford, but she was a friend of a friend, so I didn't know her very well.
Fizzy: Oh, so sorry to hear about your mother. You have mentioned her once or twice in your blog but pretty much just suffer without even complaining. You're always so cheery and newsy! Glad your father got some help, too.
Peanut Queen: I'm very curious about his story, it touched me. He seemed so determined to change his will, and his wife so pleased with him.
I had a really good visit ;)
Sorry about your DL photo, are you due for a new one soon?
:phil: Love your rebuttal of urban legends!
Hick: Sorry to hear about your father. It's so good of you to care for him, even if he doesn't seem to appreciate it! At least you know that you're doing the right thing.
Aims & Katie: Yes, so sad and I'm finding out--such a common experience. Look at how many people just in this little part of Bloggerworld have or have had that experience!
DISCOMBOBULATEDAT100MPH: That was what touched me most, how that old man was trying to take care of his wife in the only way he still could.
Walker: There certainly are horrible abuses of wills by family members. All the more reason to have one done now while of healthy mind and body, if you don't have a will yet, that is!
Anvilcloud & :phil: A will (or updating your will) is always a good idea! I've had a will for 15 years already. First had it done when I was going through a biopsy and then through surgery. My son was really young then and I had to make sure he would be provided for.
PBS: why a biopsy and then go through a surgery if I may be so bold? I hope all is well now.
Ohh, that poor man. If it's not humiliating enough, then forced to sign a piece of paper, makes me wanna cry :(
It's a story that will affect us all one day. It certainly does make one think. i hope his heart is less heavy now that it is taken care of.
I definitely don't want to live to be that old and frail.
My last license was made from cardboard/paper and had no pic since I renewed through the mail. I think they're trying to do away with that now, which is a good thing since it looked damned cheap!
Glad your new one didn't turn out as bad as you were expecting.
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