Friday, August 05, 2005

Small furry mammals

I had Ricky and the ferrety guys outside in the nice weather last night. The previous night was windy and rainy and I could tell they missed their little outing for fresh air. I was going out the door to water the gardens later in the evening, when I noticed several rabbits dashing away from Ricky’s cage! Ricky wasn’t hiding in his dust bin or in the nice cool flowerpot that he likes, he had been out visiting with the rabbits! That was all very charming and cute (and I wish I’d snapped a photo of it) but now I’m worried about him. My Dad always told us to be sure to wear gloves when cleaning a rabbit. While I don’t plan to kill and eat any of the rabbits soon, I remember the gross, disgusting and vile parasites that a poor wild rabbit could harbor. What if Ricky has picked up some horrible disease from them? Maybe I shouldn’t bring him outside anymore, but he loves it so, and he is in the cage, not loose. Who would think the wild rabbits would come right up to his cage. But Ricky does look something like a weird, white rabbit and has some of their mannerisms, too. He was all happy and lively when I brought him back into the house. He loves to eat fresh clover stems and flowers, which I try to pick for him every day in the spring and summer.

Sometimes I think we have too many pets in our little house. But it could be a lot worse. There was a news article in the online newspaper yesterday about a woman with 100 cats, aptly titled “House overflows with cats”

Here are some excerpts from the news article with identifying features removed:

“A house is condemned as officers begin removing cats. Police and animal control officers will be back at the house today in an attempt to remove the rest of the estimated 100-plus cats that lived in the house. It's believed to be the largest cat rescue in city history. Rescuers took action after police received a complaint from the Department of Human Services, a police officer said. The ammonia-strength odor of cat urine and feces could be smelled two houses away Wednesday evening. Seven full trash bags and four pair of disposable rubber gloves lay in the backyard. A sign posted on the front and back doors of the house Wednesday read: ‘Condemned for human habitation. Description of violation: Very unsanitary conditions. Must be vacated immediately.'’”

They are trying to find homes for the 100 cats, which are actually very healthy and well fed. Why do some people “collect” so many pets? And why is it always a woman with dozens of cats?

Bad Analogies
...from a high school essay

1) He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

2) The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

3) Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man."

5) Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. travelling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

6) John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

7) The thunder was ominous-sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.

8) The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.

Do you have any bad analogies to share

22 Comments:

Blogger dan said...

I like your bad analogies.

What's with the 100 cats????

That's madness. Have they never heard of contraception.

6:21 AM  
Blogger Denny Shane said...

I needed a chuckle this morning and your article did exactly that for me. lol

7:10 AM  
Blogger Denny Shane said...

Plus you have been hung in the "Almost Normal Members of the Not So Normal Club"! :)

7:15 AM  
Blogger Lorna said...

I'm laughing so hard, I can't remember what an analogy is.

8:43 AM  
Blogger happyandblue2 said...

Ha,ha,ha. Those analogies were funny.
I'm kind of thinking that the cat lady just wanted someone to empty the litter boxes for her..

9:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hysterical!!

funny bunny wanted to mate?

SQMOJO

9:25 AM  
Blogger Ms Mac said...

Oh my, for a minute there I did actually think you were going to kill and eat your rabbits. I'm not sure that I'm convinced otherwise, truth be told! ;-)

Excellent bad analogies. I don't have any to add, I'm afraid. My brain is quite empty, much like a big old tin with nothing in it.

9:35 AM  
Blogger katie said...

The cat person sounds like a hoarder. Apparently it is a documented form of mental illness. Poor cats.

10:02 AM  
Blogger thequeen said...

I love the analogies. the hummingbird one made me laugh out loud. Silly.
Thankyou for the link and the nice comment you left on my blog. I will link you too:)

1:07 PM  
Blogger ...just-rambling... said...

Your bad analogies were funny! Thanks for sharing!

1:53 PM  
Blogger Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

100 cats??? I LOVE animals but that's a bit much.

I say that...but I'm the kind of person who'd gladly have 100 dogs should I ever aquire the space and money to keep them...:)

2:21 PM  
Blogger Kristen said...

was that the house where the old lady also had 150 dead cats in shoeboxes and was burying them in the back yard?

ok, nevermind.

4:33 PM  
Blogger deni said...

That's ridicoulous, could you imagine the stench? I have one cat and one litter box and I can't stand when it gets even a little smelly.

Ewwwwwwwwwwww.

5:06 PM  
Blogger SquirrleyMojo said...

comments galore!

9:14 PM  
Blogger Dale said...

Love those comparisons! Where do you find this stuff?

9:25 PM  
Blogger Dale said...

Oh poo! I forgot to ask you if I could use them on my blog. Can I? Hmmmm?

9:26 PM  
Blogger JODSTER said...

what's wrong with those analogies....

Great... I'm still the same writer I ws in high school.

...sigh...

9:37 PM  
Blogger Katya said...

brilliant analogies, very funny...

hope Ricky is ok, i'm sure he'll be fine...and 100 is over excessive...lol - i love animals just as much as the next person, but the smell must have been unbearable...

:0)

2:39 AM  
Blogger Martin said...

When I got the same forwarded e-mail you did with all the analogies in (:-p) I'm sure I remember seeing this:

"The little boat skimmed gently across the pond in exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't"

10:09 AM  
Blogger Kevin said...

The brick fell to ground like a red, heavy stone.

2:45 PM  
Blogger glomgold said...

Hahahaha! These analogies are fantastic!!

2:26 PM  
Blogger The Best Cat Trees said...

PBS, Been looking on the web for the latest information on cat urine odor - saw your site clicked on it.Found Small furry mammals, maybe not a perfect match - but found it interesting anyway.. off to look for cat urine odor..

12:46 PM  

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